Amazing book the Bible. I’ve, so far, come across six references to pissing against a wall…
1 Samuel 25:22
…and more also do God unto the enemies of David, if I leave of all that pertain to him by the morning light any that pisseth against the wall.
1 Samuel 25:34
…surely there had not been left unto Nabal by the morning light any that pisseth against the wall.
1 Kings 14:10
…behold, I will bring evil upon the house of Jeroboam, and will cut off from Jeroboam him that pisseth against the wall.
1 Kings 16:11
… he slew all the house of Baasha: he left him not one that pisseth against a wall, neither of his kinsfolks, nor of his friends.
1 Kings 21:21
…I will bring evil upon thee, and will take away thy posterity, and will cut off from Ahab him that pisseth against the wall.
2 Kings 9:8
…the whole house of Ahab shall perish: and I will cut off from Ahab him that pisseth against the wall.
The Higgs Boson, sometimes referred to as the ‘god particle,’ much to the chagrin of scientists who prefer the official name, is a tiny particle that researchers long suspected existed. Its discovery lends strong support to the Standard Model of particle physics, or the known rules of particle physics that scientists believe govern the basic building blocks of matter. The Higgs boson particle is so important to the Standard Model because it signals the existence of the Higgs field, an invisible energy field present throughout the universe that imbues other particles with mass. Since its discovery two years ago, the particle has been making waves in the physics community. Now that scientists measured the particle’s mass last year, they can make many other calculations, including one that seems to spell out the end of the universe.
Posted in Christianity, God, Religion, Science, The Bible
Tagged Bible, Christianity, God, god particle, Higgs boson, Physics, Religion, Science
I’ve never understood how Christians can believe in such utter tosh as the Holy Trinity.
The Athanasian Creed, as it’s called, is widely accepted among Christians including the Roman Catholic church, some Anglican churches, and Lutheran churches. Some say that you cannot be a true Christian without belief in the Trinity.
Here is a short section of the Creed…
…we worship one God in Trinity, and Trinity in Unity; Neither confounding the Persons; nor dividing the Essence. For there is one Person of the Father; another of the Son; and another of the Holy Ghost. But the Godhead of the Father, of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost, is all one; the Glory equal, the Majesty coeternal. Such as the Father is; such is the Son; and such is the Holy Ghost. The Father uncreated; the Son uncreated; and the Holy Ghost uncreated. The Father unlimited; the Son unlimited; and the Holy Ghost unlimited. The Father eternal; the Son eternal; and the Holy Ghost eternal. And yet they are not three eternals; but one eternal. As also there are not three uncreated; nor three infinites, but one uncreated; and one infinite. So likewise the Father is Almighty; the Son Almighty; and the Holy Ghost Almighty. And yet they are not three Almighties; but one Almighty. So the Father is God; the Son is God; and the Holy Ghost is God. And yet they are not three Gods; but one God…
The poor authors, going through all those mental gymnastics; for what?
Why not go for just one God for Christ’s sake?
Posted in Christianity, God, Religion, The Bible
Tagged Athanasian Creed, Bible, Christianity, God, Holy Ghost, Holy Trinity, Jesus, Religion
Are you sitting comfortably? Let me tell you a story.
There’s this chap named Eliseus and he’s on the road to a place called Bethel when a gang of forty-two kids show up and start calling him names, taking the piss out of the fact that he’s bald. Not nice. So who could blame Eliseus for being annoyed and cursing the cheeky little sods?
But hey, God was on Eliseus’ side and He sent two wild bears out of the woods to claw and tear the forty-two kids to death for calling Eliseus a baldy.
Now, personally, I think a good spanking would have been a more than adequate punishment; or maybe a lightening bolt to scare the shit out of the little buggers.
But no, God went straight for the bear murder.
Mind you, on the plus side, those forty-two kids never took the piss out of anybody ever again.
The Bible never ceases to amaze.
(4 Kings 2:23-24)
Posted in Christianity, God, Religion, The Bible
Tagged 4 Kings 2:23-24, Baldness, Bible, Christianity, Eliseus, God, murder, Religion, wild bears
Allah, Yahweh, Jehovah, Elohim, Adonai, pick your favourite, I’ll just call Him God for convenience and presume He is of the male gender as tradition says He is.
According to the Torah, the Qur’an and the Bible, God is …
Omniscient (all knowing).
Omnipotent (all powerful).
Omnipresent (everywhere at the same time).
But this Supreme Being of the Holy Books seems to have a problem. He wants us all to grovel in front of Him forever. Worship Him alone; Make sacrifices to Him; Sing His praises; Ask Him for help; ignore everyone and everything else. And if we do not, the penalties are severe.
In a human being this would probably be diagnosed as narcissistic personality disorder, in which a person is excessively preoccupied with personal adequacy, power, prestige and vanity, mentally unable to see the destructive damage they are causing to themselves and to others in the process. It is estimated that this condition affects one percent of the human population, with rates greater for men. Narcissistic personality disorder was historically called megalomania, and is a form of severe egocentrism.
A diagnosis of narcissistic personality disorder must meet five or more of the following symptoms:
- Has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g; exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognised as superior without commensurate achievements)
- Is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love.
- Believes that he or she is “special” and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions)
- Requires excessive admiration.
- Has a very strong sense of entitlement, e.g; unreasonable expectations of especially favourable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations.
- Is exploitative of others, e.g; takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends.
- Lacks empathy, e.g; is unwilling to recognise or identify with the feelings and needs of others.
- Is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her.
- Regularly shows arrogant, haughty behaviours or attitudes.
Yep, that’s your Supreme Being!
Posted in Christianity, Freedom, God, Islam, Qur'an, Religion, The Bible
Tagged Adonai, Allah, Bible, Christianity, Elohim, God, Islam, Jehovah, Qur'an, Religion, Yahweh
Why the picture of this lovely bird, the hoopoe?
Islam is the third and latest of that mainstream loopy triumvirate of religions spawned out of the Middle East, and borrows heavily from it’s predecessors.
Opening the Qur’an at random I chance upon the twenty-seventh surah (a surah is one of 114 chapters in the Qur’an). This surah is called “The Ant”, because it features… ahem… ants; and perhaps because the ants perfect organisation under one cause chimes well with the Islamic idea of slavish obedience.
In this surah King Solomon claims to have been taught the language of birds and forms armies of men, jinn and birds; he then comes across some ants, and “an ant exclaimed: O ants! Enter your nests lest Solomon and his armies crush you, without noticing.” Shortly afterwards Solomon turns to the birds in his army and asks “How is it that I see not the hoopoe, or is he among the absent? I verily will punish him most severely or slay him, or he verily shall bring me a valid excuse.”
The hoopoe did eventually put in an appearance. Phew!
Talking ants and hoopoes needing an excuse for absence?
Who believes this nonsense?
Posted in Christianity, God, Islam, Religion, The Bible
Tagged ants, Bible, Christianity, God, hoopoe, Islam, King Soloman, Religion, Surah